There are 2 things that i have recently learnt. Allow me to share.
1) We are so busy with our lives everyday that when we meet our friends or family members, we do not build relationships. All we do is reporting and producing cliches. Think about it, is there someone you know who also knows you very well? Apart from God that is. You see, every time we meet its always what you or your friend had done over the week or a certain period of time. Its always i did this, i did that. But never about what or how i feel over the week. Face it, we are not honest when it really counts. In being so afraid to hurt others, we refrain from telling the truth and that is where we fail as friends and to some extent, family. We are just not transparent enough with each other. This is because we feel that if we allow ourselves to become vulnerable we would never be able to get back on our feet again. True friends will always build you up, never tear you down.
An example of a way to do is: so and so, what you are doing now e.g. smoking/drinking etc, is hurting yourself. I want to let you know that what you do hurts me as someone who cares about you strongly. I feel that i have failed as a friend if i continue to allow you to carry on harming yourself. You may think I'm a busybody but what i really care about is your well being.And as a brother/sister in Christ i want to remind you that you are Christ's disciple and you are not reflecting that. Is this really what you want to show others. If lets say you stop, i will still love you as i always have done so.
So here it is, honest yet affirming and supportive.
2) People that are the closest to us, we would always take for granted. Its ironic but true. Don't regret the day when they die you feel that you didn't do enough. Rather let it be the day that you feel you have done all you could and it was somehow your best effort.
So spend some time to build relationships. Stop reporting to each other and start something worthwhile.